While alone in our house, I suddenly missed my family in the Philippines. I talked to God and told about  my what ifs. There are many advantages and disadvantages living in both countries. I can say that I have a good life, way back in the Philippines even though I don't have my own car. When it comes to Japan it is easy to get all things that I want but there is emptiness in my heart. Unlike in the Philippines even though I can't get want I want I'm still happy. I'm with my family, cats, dogs and friends. Unlike here in Japan I have friends but we need to schedule everything before we meet. Life is hard when I started living here, I lost some of my pets, missed my parents birthdays, and family gathering. Did I regret getting married to a Japanese? No, because there is a reason for everything why I'm here in Japan. I will trust God no matter what happen. He was with me, He is with me and He will be with me. 

Studying Japanese 2

After four years living here in Japan, I can say that my Japanese are improving. But it’s easy to to forget what I learned. But I keep trying, because I have goal that I need to reach. Learning Japanese is not easy because there are words that’s hard to pronounce. Complicated kanji that hard to write but I really enjoy learning Kanji. I like how the Japanese students study Kanji and the Japanese itself. Some of my students also complain to me that Kanji and katakana are hard. I think we have the same dilemma after all. But I will try my best to be fluent in Japanese.

Studying Japanese 2

After four years living here in Japan, I can say that my Japanese are improving. But it’s easy to to forget what I learned. But I keep trying, because I have goal that I need to reach. Learning Japanese is not easy because there are words that’s hard to pronounce. Complicated kanji that hard to write but I really enjoy learning Kanji. I like how the Japanese students study Kanji and the Japanese itself. Some of my students also complain to me that Kanji and katakana are hard. I think we have the same dilemma after all. But I will try my best to be fluent in Japanese.

Learning Japanese

 Learnig new language is fun and exciting. Specially when you learn new words and how to express it. I'm studying Japanese for almost seven years. I can communicate but only limited. They said that once you live in Japan it will be easy to learn because you are already there. I'm almost four years living here in Japan and little improvements day by day. It is really hard to study Japanese because I'm almost tired from work. I want to spend my weekends resting on my bed and cleaning our house. When I was in the Philippines good thing that I studied already hiragana, katakana and some kanji. But this year I've decided to study harder in Japanese, I want to improve my Japanese because of the opportunities that I want  to try. I need to improve more reading and vocabularies. 

If you have any tips and recommendations please comment down below. 

ありがとうございます。じゃ　またよろしくお願いします。

Childless Marriage

Almost five years married but never have a child even one. There many things happened in five years. Family member interfered of having a child, pandemic and being new to a country. A lot of people encourage and helped me and my husband to have a baby. But no matter how we tried we failed. Got pressured from both family and friends when can we have a baby. Until one of us got tried because that body didn’t; respond anymore. At first it was hard for me because I want to have my own family. I prayed and surrendered it to God, that if it His will I’m happy and grateful that He entrusted me a life or lives. But if not I’m still happy and be grateful to Him because He knows and have better plan. I already have peace in my heart because I trust God. But people keep commenting about having a child and I should praying and fasting, serve the church and comparing women in the Bible that are barren. There is nothing wrong about it, but they keep insisting having a child to those things. On the first place I’m not barren. I feel that my marriage is not complete because we don’t have a child. That we are less because we don’t have a child.  It gives a lot of pressure and stress which is not good. It is not by choice not to have child or decided but I already surrendered it to God. Why do people think that I have little faith just because I don’t have child? Couples that don’t have a child are not worthy or less inferiority into the community? I’m just tired for people keep commenting and asking why we don’t have a child yet. 

Hawak Kamay

 Nung bata pa ako tuwing lalabas ng bahay kasama ang magulang ko madalas hinahawakan ang kamay ko ni mama o ni papa para hindi ako maligaw or mawala. Hawak ng mahigpit na alam mong secured ka kasi kasama hawak ka nila. Hawak na alam mong iingatan at hindi ka pababayaan. "Kapit ka lang, para hindi ka mawala," sabi ni mama o ni papa. Ako na may maliit na kamay kakapit ng mahigpit sa kanila. Hawak kamay sa kanila kasabay nilang lumakad. Pero nung namulat ng kunti sa mundo kumalas sa kanilang pagkakahawak na akalang kaya ng humarap pero paulit-ulit na nadadapa. Patuloy na hindi pinapansin ang kanilang kamay na handang umalalay. Hanggang sa tuluyan ng lumisan at bumukod sa pag-aakalang kayang tumayo mag-isa. Pero makalipas ng ilang taon, pag-uwi ay makikita mo na malaki na ang pinagbago ng kanilang pangangatawan. Wala na ang bakas ng kabataan kundi katandaan na dulot ng paglipas ng panahon. Muling humawak sa kanilang kamay hindi para ako ang gabayan kundi ako na ang gagabay at aalalay sa kanilang  paglakad. Ako na ang may kaba na baka sila ang mawala dahil sa kanilang pagkalimot sa kapaligiran. Ako na ang hahawak ng kanilang kamay at sila na ang kakapit sa 'kin ng mahigpit sa bawat lakad.

How The Holy Spirit Talks To Me

 These past few weeks I have had many things to do from my personal life to work until my spiritual life got affected. I'm aware that my spiritual life is failing. But I praise God that the Holy Spirit is always there to guide and strengthen me on my journey here on Earth.  And during my free quiet time, the Holy Spirit talks to me through my surroundings. I always thank Him that He makes everything quiet and talks to me. He walks on my side and talks to me when I'm going to work. One morning while going to work I thought about my past, the Holy Spirit told me how God protected me and how ready I am to let go of my comfort zone. I have been through many trials in my first year here in Japan but through God's grace, those trials make me stronger. Philippians 4:13, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." That's why I love morning walks because it is the only time we're we can talk more.